Hello, so pleased to ‘meat’ you! My name is Pant-o-mime; no idea how I got that name because my name is actually Colin! Anyway, I’ll be the narrator of this tale – which means I get to tell the tale in between any of the tale that you will actually be told!
As you can see, as a narrator I get to sit in the comfy chair for the full 24 days – so I hope you also have a comfy chair because I’ve read what ‘he’s’ written before and you are going to need it! If you’ve not heard this tale before; well, there’s a simple reason for it – no-one knows how it will turn out! Each day, a window of the LEGO city advent Calendar is opened and whatever comes out has to be included in the story. It may change the plot, or may help it… so, with our marker pens at the ready, let’s start the story.
My story will be fun to tell
Lots of adventures and turns to befell.
I hope what Frog has planned is a walk in the grass
Otherwise the rewrites will be a pain in the neck.
Our story begins at the start, which is a good place for stories to begin. Meet Jack.
Jack is a hard working country lad, who has a good heart and a strong sense of right and wrong. This being the pantomime season, the Principle Boy is played by a girl (nope, I don’t know either, but that’s the rules). So say hello to Stephanie – but remember, Stephanie will be called Jack throughout the story; yup, this will get confusing!
Anyway, Steph… Jack (oops, don’t think anyone noticed) was working on the farm when her aunt Boris came up to her.
“Jack” said Aunt Boris, “I need you to go to the market and sell Daisy, our cow, and get some money so that we can pay Lord Trencham our tax fees” (oh, you can boo if I mention Lord Trencham, he’s our baddy… at least for the moment)
“But Aunt Boris” said Jack “Daisy is our only cow… except when you’re grumpy… anyway – she does our accounting for us.”
“I’m sorry Jack” replied Aunt Boris, “But I have a choice; either I release some of our funds tied up in tax equity and avoidance schemes or I sell the cow. And this is pantomime season, so it’s got to be the cow. Take her to the market. Oh, and don’t be selling her for any magic beans – I’m pretty certain that’s a bad investment.”
So Jack took Daisy to the market. Actually, Jack felt guilty, so he took her to the cinema and the zoo as well. But before they got to the market, Jack was met by a strange man.
“I’ll buy your cow for these magic cookies” he said.
“Don’t you mean magic beans?” replied Jack.
“Well, they are made from bran, so I’m not sure” replied the stranger. “But they are magic, so it has to be a good deal.”
Now Jack was good at heart, but had a shocking sense of value. He was also hungry, having only eaten 6 eggs, 4 sausages, 7 bacon strips, 3 pancakes and 2 slices of toast for breakfast; so the cookies sounded quite nice. Daisy knew this was a bad idea, and started to stamp her feet. But Jack didn’t really understand the tap dance that Daisy was performing (who would know that daisy was tapping out “THIS IS A BAD IDEA DON’T ACCEPT UNLESS THEY PAY FOR 700 COOKIES YOU IDIOT” in Morse code) so he agreed at 2 two cookies. As Daisy was handed over, Jack took a bite of one of the cookies.
“Blerggh!” he cried “They’ve got ginger in them!!”
He stuffed them into his pocket and headed back. Something told him that he’d got something wrong, but he couldn’t work out quite what it was. He had sold Daisy though, and that was what Aunt Boris had asked for.
“Hello Small Boy Clutching an Envelope” Jack Said. “Who are you and how will you affect this story?”
“I’m Colin!” replied the Small Boy Clutching an Envelope. “I’m hoping to post my letter to Santa!”
“So why are you standing here and not posting it in the letterbox in the village?”
“Because letters posted this close to Christmas have to be sent through the special post box!”
“Okay” replied Jack, “where is the post box?”
“I don’t know” replied Colin. “The Special Post Box is supposed to be near here, but I don’t have the actual location. I have a couple of clues to help me, but I think I will need some help. Could you help me?”
At that moment, Jack remembered what Aunt Boris had told him to do regarding Daisy; what Jack had done regarding Daisy’s sale; What Aunt Boris had done when Jack was told to paint Aunt Boris’ porch red… and when he had come back and told Aunt Boris that she didn’t have a Porsche, it was a BMW…
“I seem to have a complete blank in my diary for the next month or so” said Jack. “I’ll help you find your post box. I just hope it doesn’t turn up soon.”
“Why’s that?” asked Colin.
“No reason” replied Jack.
Today’s Advent treat:
It’s Colin! I have to thank Sue for the sudden plot twist – I’d been planning a Jack and the Beanstalk story (let’s see if I get back to that!) and instantly Colin threw a curveball into the mix! I hadn’t looked at the box cover and Sue has suggested a probable future gift – as noted before, I have no idea what the next thing will be – but it was good enough to throw the future plot line in.
From a toy perspective, this is a good opener; the Star Wars advent calendar began with a spaceship – so I think the City range gets the advantage.